How's that for a dramatic blog post title? I should preface this post by saying that everyone is perfectly safe and fine, despite the fact that a knife-wielding intruder did try to enter our home Friday afternoon.
This isn't my story, though it is mine to tell. The fact is, the children were home alone.
Three of the children were upstairs. Twelve year old Sawyer was lying on his bed reading a Percy Jackson book. Ten year old Teddy was playing a video game in the loft. Two year old Echo was napping in her crib in her room.
The other two children had been playing chase downstairs but had stopped for a snack break in the living room. Eight year old Everett was standing in the foyer and six year old Jack was sitting on a recliner behind him when they suddenly heard "lockpicking sounds" coming from the front door. As they watched, the lock lever began to turn. Everett sprinted forward and got there just as the lever was 2/3 to the unlocked position. He forced it quickly to the locked position and looked through the lower peephole that I had had installed at small kid height. He saw that a man was standing there and ran to the dining room window a few feet from the front door to get a better look.
The wooden window blinds were drawn so he lifted a slat and peeked through. He saw a tall black man holding a fine edge steak knife, standing still, looking at the door.
Everett and Jack ran to the top of the stairs and Everett quickly told Teddy what had happened. Teddy ran downstairs and into the kitchen to get two fine edge steak knives of his own, positioned himself in front of the door, and told Everett to check through the dining room window to see if the man was still there. The man was gone.
Teddy put the knives away and called my cell. I told him to round everyone up into Everett and Jack's bedroom (it's the largest and faces the street) and lock themselves in while I called 911.
Now upstairs, Teddy looked out the back loft window to make sure the intruder wasn't in the back yard and then grabbed an L shaped towel holder that had fallen off of the bathroom wall at some point. Meanwhile, Everett ran to look out of his bedroom window to make sure the intruder wasn't in the front yard. They filled Sawyer in and they all decided to lock themselves in Echo's room so she could stay in her crib. When they went in she was standing in her crib, holding onto the side, having just woken up. "Hey guys," she said. Teddy positioned himself in front of Echo's door with the L shaped piece of metal and the boys discussed their plan of action should the intruder break through the door (Teddy would slam the metal into the side of his head, Sawyer would hit him with some other object), and waited.
When Teddy had called me I was on Lakeline Boulevard, headed to Target to buy Everett a last minute birthday present. I had overheard him telling Teddy all excitedly that he couldn't wait to get a snorkel for his birthday, a few days away. He had asked for one a few months ago and I vaguely remembered responding with a trite, "Hmm, why don't we wait until your birthday".
That was my vaguely noble sounding errand. Thirty minutes later I had an appointment to get new shellac. Between helping friends move and volleyball over the weekend, I knew they would be breaking left and right if I didn't get them armored up during this afternoon window of opportunity.
I called 911 while U turning, and immediately hit my first red light. Bell Boulevard.
"This is 911, do you need police, fire or ambulance?"
"Police"
"What is your address? ... Transferring you to Williamson County"
"This is 911, do you need police, fire or ambulance?"
"Police"
"What is your address? ... What is your emergency?"
"A man with a knife tried to break into our house. He did not get in. My children are home alone and locked in a room upstairs"
"Where are you? ... How long will it take you to get back? ... What are the ages of the children ... What is your phone number?"
"Cell or home?"
"Cell ... Now what is your home number? ... "
"Please don't call them. I didn't think to tell them to bring the phone with them and I don't know if they have it. I don't want them to go downstairs to get it if they didn't."
"The mom doesn't want us to call them. No. NO! The phone might be downstairs. We don't want the children to leave the room they're in. Yes the mom says they're locked in a room upstairs. ... (type type) Don't worry mom, police officers were dispatched right away, they are on their way. They want you to stay on the line. Are you close?"
"Oh I figured, don't worry. I'm entering my neighborhood now. ... Are parents allowed to speed in emergency situations? ... (silence, then a nervous titter from the 911 operator) ... Trying not to. I'm going 5 over the speed limit. Ok, I see an SUV that says Constable. We're arriving at the same time."
I parked in the driveway out of habit, jumped out and headed to the street. The officer told me to stand back and wait by his car. I knew the drill. This was after all the second time Everett had encountered an intruder. Another story, another state.
The officer began loping in a police officer type way towards the front door with his gun pointing skywards as I yelled out, "Don't you want the key?". He jiggled the doorknob and then came back for the key. As he entered the house the alarm began wailing and the second police officer pulled up. He came running up the property line between my house and the next and asked which house it was. I pointed at the open doorway and told him that the first officer had just gone inside. I knew the moment he spotted the weak point in the hedge that encloses all of the front patio area except for a gap at the walkway on the opposite side. Despite all of my admonishments, the children repeatedly crawl through this spot in the hedge so that there is now a large empty space at the bottom. Officer #2 decided to abide by the philosophy of parkour - get from point A to point B in the most efficient and fastest way possible. He crashed his 6' 3"ish body through my hedge and ran into the house beyond.
I texted two of my neighbor friends so they wouldn't worry about the police cars. A third officer arrived and ran through the side gate to check the back yard. As a fourth officer pulled up, the first two appeared at the front door and motioned for us to come inside. The children were already downstairs and Everett had given his account (minus the bit about Teddy and the knives, I heard that later). The third officer appeared at the back patio sliding glass door, trying the lock. The fourth officer let him in.
They called Everett over and asked him if he remembered what the man was wearing. Everett said no. I asked what he did remember about the man. Everett said the man had brown skin. I explained that brown skin meant really really dark skin. That the boys called my skin tan. I asked Everett more questions. Tall or short? Tall. "As tall as me?" asked Officer #2, the hedge crasher. "Almost as tall as you, but a little shorter". Fat or thin? "Normal, not fat or thin." Was he wearing a hat? No. Did he have hair? Yes, dark brown hair.
The first police officer said he had seen a man matching that description crossing through a muddy area nearby on his way to our house. They didn't seem hopeful that they would find him, or whoever the intruder had been. Officer #2 said there were three options. The first option was that they would all patrol the area for the next 20 minutes. I missed the second and third options because they sounded very unexciting and so my AD/HD kicked in and shouted "LALALALALALA" into my brain as I backtracked on all that had happened. I was brought back to reality by the officer asking me which option I wanted them to take.
I said, "Oh when you said there were three options I didn't realize that I would get to choose." The second and third options had been something about waiting and paperwork, so I said, "I'd like option #1. Please patrol the area for a while".
We were chatting about fake solicitors who jiggle doorknobs when the phone rang. I told the officers that it was my hubby. They immediately stepped outside to give me privacy.
"Hey husband, I
can't talk right now because there are police officers here but everyone is fine.
"What?!"
"I'll call you back to explain." (I really do call him husband, not the most original pet name)
"Ok."
Officer #2 asked how old my children were. Oh boy. Here I was in the exact hypothetical situation I had discussed over and over with friends in the past - would a police officer be ok with our decision that Sawyer was mature enough to start babysitting?
"They are 12, 10, 8, 6, and 2. The two older boys are American Red Cross certified babysitters. The eldest is additionally First Aid certified. There is no minimum legal age for babysitting in Texas, correct?"
"Yes you're right. There is no minimum age. We ask that a babysitter be gauged on whether they are mature enough. Do they know what to do in an emergency. Do they know to call 911."
"Well technically they called me and I called 911".
"They did what they were supposed to do. They called for help. They locked themselves in a room. You did a good job".
I have a special place in my heart for Officer #2, even if he did crash through the weak point in my hedge.
The police officers left.
I told the kids, "Boys, remember today as the day that Everett saved all of your lives". The other boys turned to look at him seriously. He smiled faintly with pride. I asked Everett if he'd been scared at any point. "A little, when the door lock started turning". I told the boys how proud I was of all of them.
I began texting details to the hubby. There was the iffy action Teddy took in holding two steak knives in front of the door while Everett checked the window again. We often discussed different emergency situations that could arise while they were home alone. Anytime we talked about what to do if there was an intruder, Teddy would say that he would run to get a kitchen knife and do what he needed to do to protect everyone. I always told him that he should stay away from the knives, that an intruder could take a knife and use it on him. But this intruder already had a knife.
The hubby texted me, "What do you think about the kids' reactions?"
I took a few seconds to think.
"Totally fine - I'm proud of them"
"Ok, just wanted to be sure you felt that before I tell them also"
I recapped. "Everett locked the door when it was about to open, he looked out the window, he called Teddy. Teddy made sure the house was secure in the short term while protecting them with show of force in case he came through the door while Everett checked the window again. Teddy called me and put away the knives. They looked out of the upstairs windows and then locked themselves in with Echo. What do you think about the knives?"
"I think those two are warriors and the coolest kids I've ever heard of."
When he got home, he told Teddy and Everett exactly that. And he told them that they were his heroes.
Six year old Jack turned to me and said, "Mommy, it's because we care more about Echo than we do our own lives".
Saturday, August 17, 2013
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Our Favorite Homeschooling Software Programs
Some of the homeschooling software I bought last year is coming up for renewal so I wanted to share the ones that we most loved and will be renewing again/buying in the future. These four really stood out as both teaching valuable skills AND being engaging for the kids.
The third and fourth would be valuable for home or public schooled kids who want to keep their math and reading skills honed through the Summer. We do school year round so we're going to renew and keep chugging along.
I've included a link to where each can be purchased at a discount price through a buyers coop anyone can sign up for. This potentially benefits me in that I earn "smart points" if you go to their site via my link. However, I am only including the four that we got the most use of and plan to continue to use in the future :) This is the entirety of our software use at this point, and it is so nice to have time freed up to work with other kiddos or give attention to toddler monster Echo.
Rosetta Stone (click here)
I bought this software for my two older boys to do Spanish. I have them do three units at a time and for the most part they do it without complaint, though occasionally voice that they wish it stated what the words meant in English. The magic of the Rosetta method is that English is never written or spoken. Instead the Spanish is learned through contextual clues given through photos on the screen, and the program builds vocabulary on itself slowly over time. A microphone is employed to have the children practice their pronunciation. My 10yo sometimes gets frustrated with this sometimes because they do expect you to pronounce the words perfectly. Revision and periodic tests is built in throughout the program. I did a demo version of the German program before I bought ours in Spanish and I found it fun and addictive :)
Mark Kistler's Art Lessons (click here)
This man is just a genius. What are you are getting here is 3D drawing lessons in video format that your kids can pause and play as they draw along. Mark Kistler is adorable, funny and is truly gifted in both inspiring and entertaining kids :) There are videos for younger kids called "Mini Marshmallows" that my 6 and 8 year olds use, and more complex drawings for older kids and adults. The characters include zany things my kids love like aliens and animals doing improbable things :) This is a great art curriculum or Summer boredom buster.
Reading Eggs (click here)
We had originally tried another popular software phonics program (Explode the Code Online) and my younger boys found it very dull. This one on the other hand is bright and fun with silly characters and songs that teach in a way that is exciting for the kids but not obnoxious for moms listening in nearby. This is completely hands off, invaluable phonics learning with beautiful graphics. No painful workbooks or phonics flash cards needed - Reading Eggs teaches it all. We combine this program with reading Hooked on Phonics and BOB books and boom we're done. Even on days I don't plan to do any phonics, the little boys will ask to be allowed to do it - "O.K...I guess so...If you insist" :D
We were recently able to demo their new program Math Seeds as well which the kids also loved. There's a discount coming up in a couple of weeks we're waiting for before we sign up :) I'll post a link when I get it.
Timez Attack (click here)
This software teaches all four types of math facts in a fun video game format. It keeps track of which math facts your child has mastered and has yet to master. There are different 3D environments your child's character goes through, and math fact answers are used to open doors and defeat foes. At times numbers are represented as groups of circles that your child's character must run around and collect, forcing them to focus on each grouping and how they combine. During battles, math fact answering is timed. My older kiddos are always excited to go "play" Timez Attack and have gotten much faster at doing their multiplication (what I've been using the software for).
Hope these help your family as much as they've helped mine :)
The third and fourth would be valuable for home or public schooled kids who want to keep their math and reading skills honed through the Summer. We do school year round so we're going to renew and keep chugging along.
I've included a link to where each can be purchased at a discount price through a buyers coop anyone can sign up for. This potentially benefits me in that I earn "smart points" if you go to their site via my link. However, I am only including the four that we got the most use of and plan to continue to use in the future :) This is the entirety of our software use at this point, and it is so nice to have time freed up to work with other kiddos or give attention to toddler monster Echo.
Rosetta Stone (click here)
I bought this software for my two older boys to do Spanish. I have them do three units at a time and for the most part they do it without complaint, though occasionally voice that they wish it stated what the words meant in English. The magic of the Rosetta method is that English is never written or spoken. Instead the Spanish is learned through contextual clues given through photos on the screen, and the program builds vocabulary on itself slowly over time. A microphone is employed to have the children practice their pronunciation. My 10yo sometimes gets frustrated with this sometimes because they do expect you to pronounce the words perfectly. Revision and periodic tests is built in throughout the program. I did a demo version of the German program before I bought ours in Spanish and I found it fun and addictive :)
Mark Kistler's Art Lessons (click here)
This man is just a genius. What are you are getting here is 3D drawing lessons in video format that your kids can pause and play as they draw along. Mark Kistler is adorable, funny and is truly gifted in both inspiring and entertaining kids :) There are videos for younger kids called "Mini Marshmallows" that my 6 and 8 year olds use, and more complex drawings for older kids and adults. The characters include zany things my kids love like aliens and animals doing improbable things :) This is a great art curriculum or Summer boredom buster.
Reading Eggs (click here)
We had originally tried another popular software phonics program (Explode the Code Online) and my younger boys found it very dull. This one on the other hand is bright and fun with silly characters and songs that teach in a way that is exciting for the kids but not obnoxious for moms listening in nearby. This is completely hands off, invaluable phonics learning with beautiful graphics. No painful workbooks or phonics flash cards needed - Reading Eggs teaches it all. We combine this program with reading Hooked on Phonics and BOB books and boom we're done. Even on days I don't plan to do any phonics, the little boys will ask to be allowed to do it - "O.K...I guess so...If you insist" :D
We were recently able to demo their new program Math Seeds as well which the kids also loved. There's a discount coming up in a couple of weeks we're waiting for before we sign up :) I'll post a link when I get it.
Timez Attack (click here)
This software teaches all four types of math facts in a fun video game format. It keeps track of which math facts your child has mastered and has yet to master. There are different 3D environments your child's character goes through, and math fact answers are used to open doors and defeat foes. At times numbers are represented as groups of circles that your child's character must run around and collect, forcing them to focus on each grouping and how they combine. During battles, math fact answering is timed. My older kiddos are always excited to go "play" Timez Attack and have gotten much faster at doing their multiplication (what I've been using the software for).
Hope these help your family as much as they've helped mine :)
Friday, September 7, 2012
The time my kids made me go to spin class
This story is a lesson in the importance of accountability and a reminder that your kids pay attention to everything that you say and do.
WAY TOO MUCH BACK STORY
First some back story on my weight/fitness history. Actually WAY too much back story. I'm wordy. And I've had a lot of kids.
I had my four boys roughly two years apart with my fourth born when I was 29.
When a baby was ~6mo I would start calorie counting, striving for 1700 calories a day (I'm 5'8" and 1700 is not a sacrifice), would make sure to eat breakfast (I'm a skipper), and would do an hour of exercise DVD's a few times a week. I had a crazy fast metabolism in those days and easy-peasy the weight would fall right off and I'd be back to my "normal weight" by the time the baby was 9-12 mo. Once I'd lost the baby weight, I wouldn't exercise and I would stop paying attention to my calorie intake.
Baby # 4 - Gained 45 pounds, Lost 30 pounds, Gained 20 pounds, Lost 20 pounds...
There were a few things going on here. I hit 30 years old. I didn't exercise or calorie count. Also it took me a few years to get diagnosed, but I was in the early stages of an auto immune disease called Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease (UCTD) - probably either a mild or early Lupus in my case - which was draining my energy and over time I was even leaving the house less and less.
I wasn't thrilled at my new weight but I was content for a long time. Then I wasn't, so I ate more carefully and lost 10 pounds, then joined the Y and lost 10 more.
We decided to go for baby number 5. My hubby wanted a child for every finger on his hand and how can you say no to that??? :)
I got my UCTD diagnosis a few days after a successful attempt at baby number 5. Oops. We probably wouldn't have tried for number 5 if we'd known. She barely squeaked in.
PREGO AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN
One day, early in my pregnancy, I got on the Wii to do some Wii Fit and my Mii made a "bloomp" sound. Suddenly my Mii went from looking slim to looking round (I had hit the overweight BMI category). All my kids were watching and I explained it was my pregnancy weight and that it would go back to normal after the baby was born.
Baby got to 12+mo and me and my Mii were still in the overweight BMI category. I had lost some weight but not much. My medicine was working pretty well and I had more good days than bad but I wasn't making exercise a priority in my life. I was 35 pounds over my "normal weight" and I decided I REALLY wanted to see it again. At the very least I wanted to get into the healthy BMI category.
PERSONAL TRAINER (not just for the rich and famous)
A friend had been seeing a personal trainer (a mutual friend), and was looking super slender and buff and was always raving about how incredibly awesome the experience was so I talked to the hubby about working with her myself.
He wasn't very supportive at first ($) but he finally agreed I should give it a try.
I told the boys I was going to be exercising a lot more and working with a personal trainer. That I wanted my heart to be healthy. That the more I exercised the less often I would have flares (what it's called when my symptoms manifest). And that I wanted my Mii to look slim again.
My personal trainer Meredith has been amazing these last couple of months. She is kind and firm. Inspirational and holds me accountable. She is easier on me than on most of her other clients (I sometimes do a lower intensity or take a day off to rest because my joints are creaking and I have a fake fever) but it is definitely not easy. I was weight-lifting and rowing and doing the elliptical before I started working with Meredith, but I wasn't pushing myself the way I needed to be to increase my fitness level.
I've worked harder than I've ever worked before - lots of sweating, lots of pain, and a couple of times even a little gagging. The positive effects on my UCTD have been astounding. I have SO many more good days than bad days now. I only have to nap about once a week instead of it being an almost daily thing. I have less joint pain and rarely have (fake) fevers and chills.
I'm fitter and stronger. I love that my muscles are starting to poke out and be visible (to me anyway). The endorphins are addictive - I'm hooked on the high.
AND THEN THERE'S SPIN CLASS
The part of my current weekly PT homework I most dread is spin class - a group stationary bike class taught by my personal trainer. The reason is because of the terrible, horrible, traumatizing discomfort (to put it mildly) the torture seat of the spin bike puts on your nether regions. I'd done spin three times already. Once in a group class and twice one on one with my personal trainer. The first time I went to the group class I had a friend meeting me there. She said supportive things and one time I almost cried. Really. She told me I would eventually get numb (true, the last five minutes I actually had fun) and that after a few classes I wouldn't experience horrible pain at all.
Monday I did 60 minutes of weight-lifting. Tuesday I took a break. Wednesday I did 30 minutes of rowing and 45 minutes of elliptical. Thursday afternoon I flared. Flushed cheeks, creaking joints, unable to function - I took a two hour nap. I woke up feeling great and knew that I should go to spin class the next day (part of my personal training homework for the week). Spin class is a morning class and I am a grumpy, lazy person in the morning. As I was thinking about this, Sawyer walked by and I had a brilliant idea.
I ASKED SAWYER TO KEEP ME ACCOUNTABLE
Me - "Hey Sawyer, tomorrow I have to go to spin class. I have to leave at 9:45 in the morning, but I won't want to. Can you please help me get out the door?"
Sawyer - "Sure. I'll set an alarm on my watch right now."
THE NEXT MORNING, 9:15am
I was still in bed. My family lets me sleep in until 9 or 9:30 because I am a mean person in the morning. The hubby came in and tried to wake me up nicely. Wake up sweetie (kiss kiss). I peeked out and closed my eyes again. I thought about spin and went through all the reasons why I shouldn't go to spin in my head. The horrible pain associated with spin class. I just had a flare yesterday so maybe I should rest today. Hmm maybe I'd do something else later in the day, like some elliptical or the body combat class.
SAWYER ARRIVES, 9:17am
Sawyer came in, holding his arm up and looking at his watch. Darn, he had had the forethought to set his alarm for 30 minutes BEFORE I had to leave. He had outsmarted me.
Sawyer - "Mommy, hurry up and get ready. You have to be out the door at 9:45"
Me - "Mpfferggg"
Sawyer - "Come on mommy, you told me you wouldn't want to but that I had to tell you to anyway"
THE REST OF THE BOYS ARRIVE, 9:18am
Sawyer - "She doesn't want to go to her spin class"
Teddy - "Mommy, what are you going to do? Sit around all day watching "Gossip Girl" and eating lots of chocolate?"
(quick note in my defense that I only watch TV during the day if I am really really really sick - think pukey with stomach virus or feverish with a death cold, and I eat what I would consider fairly normal and medically necessary amounts of chocolate, for a girl)
Sawyer - "How about that jalapeno cheese dip you ate last night?"
Ouch!
NEW TACTICS
Teddy - "Hey mommy, aren't you the volleyball captain for your team?"
Me (cautiously) - "Yeah..."
Teddy - "Well then you should be the strongest"
Me - "The captain needs to be the strongest person on the team??"
Teddy - "Yes. It's your job to be the strongest. Plus, don't you want your Mii person to be thin again??"
I GOT UP AND WENT TO SPIN CLASS
I took two Advils and may have used some local anesthetic spray. The pain was a lot less horrible than previous times. I will confess I even had fun, some of the time ;) Meredith has great song lists. And there are those endorphins.
As we were heading out of the child care area, 6yo Jack asked me where I'd been exercising today. I pointed into the spin room.
Me - "In there. Where all those bicycles are that don't move"
Jack (peering into the room and then looking at me sideways) - "Wow. No wonder you're skinnier now"
15 more pounds until "healthy" BMI!! :)
THANK YOUS
Thank you Meredith :)
Thank you to my friends and family who help to keep me accountable :)
Thank you Sawyer for setting that alarm earlier than you knew I would have wanted you to.
WAY TOO MUCH BACK STORY
First some back story on my weight/fitness history. Actually WAY too much back story. I'm wordy. And I've had a lot of kids.
I had my four boys roughly two years apart with my fourth born when I was 29.
When a baby was ~6mo I would start calorie counting, striving for 1700 calories a day (I'm 5'8" and 1700 is not a sacrifice), would make sure to eat breakfast (I'm a skipper), and would do an hour of exercise DVD's a few times a week. I had a crazy fast metabolism in those days and easy-peasy the weight would fall right off and I'd be back to my "normal weight" by the time the baby was 9-12 mo. Once I'd lost the baby weight, I wouldn't exercise and I would stop paying attention to my calorie intake.
Baby # 4 - Gained 45 pounds, Lost 30 pounds, Gained 20 pounds, Lost 20 pounds...
There were a few things going on here. I hit 30 years old. I didn't exercise or calorie count. Also it took me a few years to get diagnosed, but I was in the early stages of an auto immune disease called Undifferentiated Connective Tissue Disease (UCTD) - probably either a mild or early Lupus in my case - which was draining my energy and over time I was even leaving the house less and less.
I wasn't thrilled at my new weight but I was content for a long time. Then I wasn't, so I ate more carefully and lost 10 pounds, then joined the Y and lost 10 more.
We decided to go for baby number 5. My hubby wanted a child for every finger on his hand and how can you say no to that??? :)
I got my UCTD diagnosis a few days after a successful attempt at baby number 5. Oops. We probably wouldn't have tried for number 5 if we'd known. She barely squeaked in.
PREGO AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN
One day, early in my pregnancy, I got on the Wii to do some Wii Fit and my Mii made a "bloomp" sound. Suddenly my Mii went from looking slim to looking round (I had hit the overweight BMI category). All my kids were watching and I explained it was my pregnancy weight and that it would go back to normal after the baby was born.
Baby got to 12+mo and me and my Mii were still in the overweight BMI category. I had lost some weight but not much. My medicine was working pretty well and I had more good days than bad but I wasn't making exercise a priority in my life. I was 35 pounds over my "normal weight" and I decided I REALLY wanted to see it again. At the very least I wanted to get into the healthy BMI category.
PERSONAL TRAINER (not just for the rich and famous)
A friend had been seeing a personal trainer (a mutual friend), and was looking super slender and buff and was always raving about how incredibly awesome the experience was so I talked to the hubby about working with her myself.
He wasn't very supportive at first ($) but he finally agreed I should give it a try.
I told the boys I was going to be exercising a lot more and working with a personal trainer. That I wanted my heart to be healthy. That the more I exercised the less often I would have flares (what it's called when my symptoms manifest). And that I wanted my Mii to look slim again.
My personal trainer Meredith has been amazing these last couple of months. She is kind and firm. Inspirational and holds me accountable. She is easier on me than on most of her other clients (I sometimes do a lower intensity or take a day off to rest because my joints are creaking and I have a fake fever) but it is definitely not easy. I was weight-lifting and rowing and doing the elliptical before I started working with Meredith, but I wasn't pushing myself the way I needed to be to increase my fitness level.
I've worked harder than I've ever worked before - lots of sweating, lots of pain, and a couple of times even a little gagging. The positive effects on my UCTD have been astounding. I have SO many more good days than bad days now. I only have to nap about once a week instead of it being an almost daily thing. I have less joint pain and rarely have (fake) fevers and chills.
I'm fitter and stronger. I love that my muscles are starting to poke out and be visible (to me anyway). The endorphins are addictive - I'm hooked on the high.
AND THEN THERE'S SPIN CLASS
The part of my current weekly PT homework I most dread is spin class - a group stationary bike class taught by my personal trainer. The reason is because of the terrible, horrible, traumatizing discomfort (to put it mildly) the torture seat of the spin bike puts on your nether regions. I'd done spin three times already. Once in a group class and twice one on one with my personal trainer. The first time I went to the group class I had a friend meeting me there. She said supportive things and one time I almost cried. Really. She told me I would eventually get numb (true, the last five minutes I actually had fun) and that after a few classes I wouldn't experience horrible pain at all.
Monday I did 60 minutes of weight-lifting. Tuesday I took a break. Wednesday I did 30 minutes of rowing and 45 minutes of elliptical. Thursday afternoon I flared. Flushed cheeks, creaking joints, unable to function - I took a two hour nap. I woke up feeling great and knew that I should go to spin class the next day (part of my personal training homework for the week). Spin class is a morning class and I am a grumpy, lazy person in the morning. As I was thinking about this, Sawyer walked by and I had a brilliant idea.
I ASKED SAWYER TO KEEP ME ACCOUNTABLE
Me - "Hey Sawyer, tomorrow I have to go to spin class. I have to leave at 9:45 in the morning, but I won't want to. Can you please help me get out the door?"
Sawyer - "Sure. I'll set an alarm on my watch right now."
THE NEXT MORNING, 9:15am
I was still in bed. My family lets me sleep in until 9 or 9:30 because I am a mean person in the morning. The hubby came in and tried to wake me up nicely. Wake up sweetie (kiss kiss). I peeked out and closed my eyes again. I thought about spin and went through all the reasons why I shouldn't go to spin in my head. The horrible pain associated with spin class. I just had a flare yesterday so maybe I should rest today. Hmm maybe I'd do something else later in the day, like some elliptical or the body combat class.
SAWYER ARRIVES, 9:17am
Sawyer came in, holding his arm up and looking at his watch. Darn, he had had the forethought to set his alarm for 30 minutes BEFORE I had to leave. He had outsmarted me.
Sawyer - "Mommy, hurry up and get ready. You have to be out the door at 9:45"
Me - "Mpfferggg"
Sawyer - "Come on mommy, you told me you wouldn't want to but that I had to tell you to anyway"
THE REST OF THE BOYS ARRIVE, 9:18am
Sawyer - "She doesn't want to go to her spin class"
Teddy - "Mommy, what are you going to do? Sit around all day watching "Gossip Girl" and eating lots of chocolate?"
(quick note in my defense that I only watch TV during the day if I am really really really sick - think pukey with stomach virus or feverish with a death cold, and I eat what I would consider fairly normal and medically necessary amounts of chocolate, for a girl)
Sawyer - "How about that jalapeno cheese dip you ate last night?"
Ouch!
NEW TACTICS
Teddy - "Hey mommy, aren't you the volleyball captain for your team?"
Me (cautiously) - "Yeah..."
Teddy - "Well then you should be the strongest"
Me - "The captain needs to be the strongest person on the team??"
Teddy - "Yes. It's your job to be the strongest. Plus, don't you want your Mii person to be thin again??"
I GOT UP AND WENT TO SPIN CLASS
I took two Advils and may have used some local anesthetic spray. The pain was a lot less horrible than previous times. I will confess I even had fun, some of the time ;) Meredith has great song lists. And there are those endorphins.
As we were heading out of the child care area, 6yo Jack asked me where I'd been exercising today. I pointed into the spin room.
Me - "In there. Where all those bicycles are that don't move"
Jack (peering into the room and then looking at me sideways) - "Wow. No wonder you're skinnier now"
15 more pounds until "healthy" BMI!! :)
THANK YOUS
Thank you Meredith :)
Thank you to my friends and family who help to keep me accountable :)
Thank you Sawyer for setting that alarm earlier than you knew I would have wanted you to.
Tuesday, August 7, 2012
Teddy's Story: Public School to Homeschool
TEDDY - 3rd Grader
logical, athletic, neat freak, quick sarcastic wit, teacher's pet, sound effects expert
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| Teddy painting a "fairy house" at his baby sister Echo's fairy garden birthday party |
Teddy was a late reader, something we were warned was common in children with articulation delays, which run in my family (Teddy had a few years of speech therapy through the public school system). He struggled with self esteem issues about being in the slow reading group, but just like his brother Sawyer before him, something suddenly clicked in 2nd grade and he took off reading. Teddy was always a model student in the classroom - respectful, responsible, attentive, sweet, straight A's. Well, with the little exception that he rarely did his homework.
PUBLIC SCHOOL HOMEWORK
I let his homework slide given his good grades and the fact that they didn't need to turn it in at his grade level. That translates to optional, right?
Besides, I felt sorry for the poor kid. He was at school (or walking to and fro) for 7 1/2 HOURS, five days a week.
By the time he got home, he was exhausted and starved for fun. There were just three hours before dinner and bedtime, and if we went hiking or to a soccer practice (or really anywhere at all), time was up.
Three hours is not long enough for:
- Sports/Outside play time
- Indoor play time
- Game time (30 mins on weekdays)
Teddy and his brothers wanted all three every day and never got it.
I never knew where I would find Teddy's homework (or any important school paperwork!). Despite being a neat freak, homework would end up in the most bizarre places.
- Crushed at the bottom of his backpack.
- In a pile underneath the dining room table.
- Behind the gerbils' aquarium.
He didn't see any value in it, which is significant in a meticulous, conscientious child such as Teddy.
Much of the homework had the feel of a band-aid - a way for parents to fill in any gaps. I wasn't a complete slacker. If a worksheet looked especially important, I'd have him sit down and knock it out, usually on a weekend (you know he loved that).
WHAT DOES F*** MEAN?
Teddy came home one day and asked about a word some third graders were saying - "Mommy, what does F*** mean?"
Woh!
My hubby and I don't swear (unless I sustain unexpected extreme pain like that time I hammered my finger). I briefly explained that it was a "bad word" we didn't want them repeating and left it at that.
But there were so many more, at such a fast pace and way younger than when Sawyer was exposed.
Another surprise was when Sawyer revealed that Teddy had a girlfriend who had sneaked a hug in the playground.
If 3rd grade was the new 5th grade, what would 5th grade bring????????
THE HOMESCHOOL DECISION
We had pulled Sawyer out of public school in February and it was going pretty great. It had been such a positive experience for us both. I was feeling closer to Sawyer than ever and learning with him was fun and fulfilling (enough of the time to make it worth it anyway, you know, like parenting).
I wanted the same for Teddy, and not when the next school year started as we had originally told him, but right away.
We decided to pull Teddy and his brother Everett (1st grader) out in March. We gave them a one week warning.
When I told Teddy he yelled "Mommy!" in a falsetto over and over again for a good five minutes. I felt like such a terrible terrible horrible awful mom. My poor traumatized child. Why hadn't I just stuck to the plan?
HIS TEACHER'S REACTION
Teachers react in one of three ways when I tell them I'm homeschooling. They respond negatively, they respond neutrally (while secretly harboring negative thoughts is what I imagine) or they say wonderful supportive things.
I wanted to share Teddy's teacher's letter to me because she was the only one (besides the amazing lady who worked with Sawyer on his social anxiety) who was supportive, and that was despite my super short notice that I was making off with one of her students:
Hey there, Well, I will be very sad and I know all the kids will miss him. Some have already asked about him. :( I'm very happy for you and your family that you're able to homeschool your children. You're a great mother. I could tell that just by how Teddy is such a great student. Good luck and I hope that Teddy will keep in touch!
An important side note that she might not have said the part about me being such a great mother if she'd had one of my other kids in her class. One very valuable thing that having a large family teaches you is what a huge role Genetics/God's design plays in a child's personality - it can be both liberating and humbling, taking away much of the pride you might have had in the good stuff ;)
Her email meant SO much to me after Teddy's terrible reaction to the news. I've since talked to several teachers or ex-teachers who are either homeschooling or have expressed that they would like to or wish they could. They always refer to "all the things I have seen and heard" in a very ominous way. I'm always dying to ask for details but I know they aren't supposed to share any (right?).
TEDDY AND HOMESCHOOLING
Teddy's transformation has been just as dramatic as Sawyer's, and in a way I would have never imagined.
Teddy had a hard time with our daily schedule the first few months, because there wasn't one. I'll go into more detail about how we do things in another blog post but in short - having parts of the day that were unstructured made him very UNCOMFORTABLE.
He wanted a schedule set out for each day. He LOVES structure and order and knowing when everything will happen. "What are we doing next? Where are we doing next? Then what will we do? What should I do now? How long will it take to get there?"
Teddy works EFFICIENTLY and FAST!!!! He had more unstructured time than anyone else.
I suddenly had a brainstorm - we needed to hit the library stat.
Angels sang as we walked through the doors.
I sent Sawyer and Teddy off and told them to come back with some books they were interested in reading - SO interested in reading that they would want to write about what they learned.
Teddy pours through piles of books on animals and has decided that he wants to be a vet one day. He LOVES TO LEARN and reads non-fiction books for fun. He is full of questions and curiosity and wants to borrow my iPhone wherever we are so he can look up the answers NOW.
How long do red pandas live? How fast can race cars go?
Public school Teddy had always diligently done the minimum of what was required of him. Deep inside he had a burning desire to learn, and none of us had had any idea.
MORE STUFF
Read about why we decided to put our children in public school despite originally wanting to homeschool - Before We Homeschooled
COMING NEXT
(Everett's story, Early Days of Homeschooling, What is Everschooling?)
Monday, July 16, 2012
Preschool Cooperatives
Although I had always tinkered with the thought of homeschooling, and had
hoarded educational supplies for years, my fourth little guy's
homeschool preschool cooperative played a big role in giving me the final push
I needed to take the plunge :)
BACKTRACKING: CENTREVILLE PRESCHOOL
My first introduction to the idea came years before when we were living in Virginia and looking for a preschool for our eldest. Everyone I spoke to raved about a local preschool that had started out as a preschool cooperative. A group of moms met in various spaces and taught their children preschool skills together. Eventually it grew so big that they hired two professional teachers as directors, bought a sweet little Victorian to house their preschool, and formed a board of parents.
When I came along there were three levels of involvement to choose from, and over the next three years I tried them all :)
1/ No involvement - the highest tuition. This worked like a standard preschool - you dropped off your child and picked them up a few hours later. These classes had a paid teacher and aide.
2/ Volunteering in the classroom - Tuition was lower because the parents took turns being the aide for the teacher. FUN!!! I loved this :) It worked out to being in the classroom once every six weeks.
3/ Volunteering on the board. I chose the state licensing director position and had a blast. My friends and family know I love researching just about anything and it was fascinating to read all of the safety regulations and work with the teachers to make sure we were in compliance for our inspections. I saw to it that we had more separation between playground equipment, more mulch under swings, and that all of the magnetic Polly Pockets were goners.
This was a social preschool with no apology. Play was seen as the work of preschoolers. The teachers were caring and nurturing and there was oodles of creative play and art time. This fit in perfectly with my own preschool philosophy and the boys loved it. Teddy's favorite stuffed animal seven years later is still the little bear he made a little bed for on his first day of preschool.
If you live in or around Centreville, Virginia or are interested in starting something similar check it out here :)
FASTFORWARDING: HOMESCHOOL PRESCHOOL COOPERATIVE
We were now living in Austin TX. Jack and I were at a playgroup for four year olds who were close to hitting official Kindergarten age when a few of us moms struck up a conversation. It turned out that we were all planning to hold our boys back a year. One of the moms told us about a homeschool preschool cooperative she was in that reminded me of Centreville Preschool's original format. I had been doing what I considered homeschool preschool with Jack (for the first time I had a child who WANTED to learn how to read and was picking up letters easily) and we were loving it - doing it with other moms would be so much fun!
I contacted the organizer and discovered that it was a friend I hadn't seen in a while - from a mom meetup I used to belong to. The thing about the Austin area is that even though there are over a million people, you are usually only two degrees of separation from anyone else. Three at the very VERY most :)
Jack and I jumped in right away and it was a BLAST! Here is how it worked. Each semester was twelve weeks long. There were +/- twelve moms (and sometimes a grandma or a dad too). Each mom would teach on any topic she loved, or pick from a list of suggestions. Moms who were more interested in support roles could pair up with other moms.
We would start out singing a hello song and doing some accompanying sign language. Then the teacher mom would introduce the topic with any mixture of books, song, movement, lecture in a way that would (hopefully) hold the attention of 3-5 year olds.
Sometimes there would be a big group activity - like the time the kids wrapped their egg using assorted recyclables and tape and we dropped them from a ladder. That was messy. It was also physics! :D
At some point some or other child would get hungry (which would of course set off a chain reaction) and we'd take a break for a snack. In the end we'd all meet back together, do some show and tell and sing the goodbye song.
There was a very minimal cost in the $40-$50 range to cover rent of the space we were using and supplies. We maintained a closet of educational and art supplies but there was also shopping money allocated to each unit. The topics were so varied - anatomy, recycling, space, art, the brain, health, safety, creativity...
Even though most of the moms hadn't hit official school years yet, they were excited about homeschooling then and in the future, and their excitement and confidence were contagious.
I decided I would homeschool Jack his Kindergarten year too (I was holding back a year after all) and then see where it went from there. Maybe I'd put him in Kindergarten the following year, or first grade, or even just keep on homeschooling him! I knew of people who had some kids in public school, some at home.
Little did I know that I would soon be homeschooling ALL of my children.
We made a difficult decision to leave the cooperative after our third semester. Jack was just starting to outgrow the activities, and I had started homeschooling his older brothers. There were many other homeschool cooperatives out there for older children but we decided to focus on finding our groove.
THANK YOU
Thank you to all of my fellow coop parents who shared their creativity, talents and enthusiasm with Jack and I. A special thank you to my friend Becky, organizer extraordinaire - who played an especially important role in my eventually having the guts to homeschool ;) Yes lady, really!
MORE STUFF
Read about why we decided to put our children in public school despite originally wanting to homeschool here - Before We Homeschooled
Read Sawyer's story - why we decided to pull our eldest out of public school in the middle of 5th grade here.
Coming next (Teddy's story, Everett's story, Early Days of Homeschooling, What is Everschooling?)
COMMENT BELOW
Have you worked with your preschooler at home? What types of things have you learned together?
BACKTRACKING: CENTREVILLE PRESCHOOL
My first introduction to the idea came years before when we were living in Virginia and looking for a preschool for our eldest. Everyone I spoke to raved about a local preschool that had started out as a preschool cooperative. A group of moms met in various spaces and taught their children preschool skills together. Eventually it grew so big that they hired two professional teachers as directors, bought a sweet little Victorian to house their preschool, and formed a board of parents.
 |
| Centreville Preschool in Centreville, VA |
When I came along there were three levels of involvement to choose from, and over the next three years I tried them all :)
1/ No involvement - the highest tuition. This worked like a standard preschool - you dropped off your child and picked them up a few hours later. These classes had a paid teacher and aide.
2/ Volunteering in the classroom - Tuition was lower because the parents took turns being the aide for the teacher. FUN!!! I loved this :) It worked out to being in the classroom once every six weeks.
3/ Volunteering on the board. I chose the state licensing director position and had a blast. My friends and family know I love researching just about anything and it was fascinating to read all of the safety regulations and work with the teachers to make sure we were in compliance for our inspections. I saw to it that we had more separation between playground equipment, more mulch under swings, and that all of the magnetic Polly Pockets were goners.
This was a social preschool with no apology. Play was seen as the work of preschoolers. The teachers were caring and nurturing and there was oodles of creative play and art time. This fit in perfectly with my own preschool philosophy and the boys loved it. Teddy's favorite stuffed animal seven years later is still the little bear he made a little bed for on his first day of preschool.
If you live in or around Centreville, Virginia or are interested in starting something similar check it out here :)
FASTFORWARDING: HOMESCHOOL PRESCHOOL COOPERATIVE
We were now living in Austin TX. Jack and I were at a playgroup for four year olds who were close to hitting official Kindergarten age when a few of us moms struck up a conversation. It turned out that we were all planning to hold our boys back a year. One of the moms told us about a homeschool preschool cooperative she was in that reminded me of Centreville Preschool's original format. I had been doing what I considered homeschool preschool with Jack (for the first time I had a child who WANTED to learn how to read and was picking up letters easily) and we were loving it - doing it with other moms would be so much fun!
I HAD TO CHECK IT OUT!
I contacted the organizer and discovered that it was a friend I hadn't seen in a while - from a mom meetup I used to belong to. The thing about the Austin area is that even though there are over a million people, you are usually only two degrees of separation from anyone else. Three at the very VERY most :)
Jack and I jumped in right away and it was a BLAST! Here is how it worked. Each semester was twelve weeks long. There were +/- twelve moms (and sometimes a grandma or a dad too). Each mom would teach on any topic she loved, or pick from a list of suggestions. Moms who were more interested in support roles could pair up with other moms.
We would start out singing a hello song and doing some accompanying sign language. Then the teacher mom would introduce the topic with any mixture of books, song, movement, lecture in a way that would (hopefully) hold the attention of 3-5 year olds.
Sometimes there would be a big group activity - like the time the kids wrapped their egg using assorted recyclables and tape and we dropped them from a ladder. That was messy. It was also physics! :D
 |
| Health: Jack learning about the importance of eating a rainbow :) |
Five or six stations would be set up with hands on activities related to
the lesson and we would all move around at a child led pace with little
siblings running around underfoot. Our first semester I was pregnant
with my fifth, but spent our second and third semesters with baby Echo
strapped to my chest. Sometimes we had a babysitter available to watch
the little ones in a toy room :)
At some point some or other child would get hungry (which would of course set off a chain reaction) and we'd take a break for a snack. In the end we'd all meet back together, do some show and tell and sing the goodbye song.
 |
| Recycling: Jack showing off his six toilet paper roll people living in a beer caddy house with baby Echo underfoot |
There was a very minimal cost in the $40-$50 range to cover rent of the space we were using and supplies. We maintained a closet of educational and art supplies but there was also shopping money allocated to each unit. The topics were so varied - anatomy, recycling, space, art, the brain, health, safety, creativity...
Even though most of the moms hadn't hit official school years yet, they were excited about homeschooling then and in the future, and their excitement and confidence were contagious.
Compost - Jack studying the various stages of veggie decomposition
I decided I would homeschool Jack his Kindergarten year too (I was holding back a year after all) and then see where it went from there. Maybe I'd put him in Kindergarten the following year, or first grade, or even just keep on homeschooling him! I knew of people who had some kids in public school, some at home.
Little did I know that I would soon be homeschooling ALL of my children.
We made a difficult decision to leave the cooperative after our third semester. Jack was just starting to outgrow the activities, and I had started homeschooling his older brothers. There were many other homeschool cooperatives out there for older children but we decided to focus on finding our groove.
THANK YOU
Thank you to all of my fellow coop parents who shared their creativity, talents and enthusiasm with Jack and I. A special thank you to my friend Becky, organizer extraordinaire - who played an especially important role in my eventually having the guts to homeschool ;) Yes lady, really!
MORE STUFF
Read about why we decided to put our children in public school despite originally wanting to homeschool here - Before We Homeschooled
Read Sawyer's story - why we decided to pull our eldest out of public school in the middle of 5th grade here.
Coming next (Teddy's story, Everett's story, Early Days of Homeschooling, What is Everschooling?)
COMMENT BELOW
Have you worked with your preschooler at home? What types of things have you learned together?
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Sawyer's Story - Public School to Homeschool
SAWYER - 5th grader
artistic, dry-witted, sweet, argumentative, slob-like-me, mercurial, complex
Like many children with articulation delays, Sawyer developed an anxiety disorder called selective mutism at three years old that made him so anxious in school or classroom-type situations that he could barely speak. He also inherited my inattentive form of ADHD and struggled to focus in class, often having to finish his schoolwork during recess or at home (on top of his homework). Despite all of his challenges he usually managed to excel on paper, missing straight A's by one percent on his last report card.
We occasionally discussed homeschooling him but his disorder improved a little bit each year. His teachers were supportive and patient, and the school provided counseling, mentors and behavioral strategies. Outside of school he saw a therapist and began taking anxiety medication in 2nd grade which helped considerably.
To our surprise, his peers were not only kind to him but he even became very popular - some combination of his air of mystery and his extreme selectivity in who he felt comfortable talking to. The phone was constantly ringing with some or other boy or girl wanting to talk to Sawyer (he had no anxiety related to phone conversations).
SEXY SEXY FIFTH GRADERS??!
Within a few months we saw our eldest transform from a child into a hormone-raging tween. We had expected that this would happen one day, but this was a horrific mutant mode we knew was heavily peer influenced. He and his friends became obsessed with having Bieber hair, with looking "sexy" and trying to get a girlfriend. We explained why he couldn't have a girlfriend at his age but he talked about it all the time anyway.
One day I went to check on Sawyer, a friend, and a few girls that were all hanging out in our front yard. I found both of the boys shirtless. They told me that they had their shirts off because it made them look hot. How was I already having to deal with this????? The shirts went back on, fast.
PERSONALITY CHANGE
In his last months of public school Sawyer had become sullen, walking with his head down, shoulders sunken in. His eyes no longer sparkled. He asked if he could start calling me "mom". If I hugged him or touched him affectionately he would immediately recoil or dodge out of the way.
We were losing Sawyer.
 |
One day, when Sawyer was in another room, his best friend told me about a "game" that kids at school had been playing that they called "the racist game". He claimed that almost all of the fifth grade boys were involved. I asked him which ones weren't and he listed some names. The way it went was that one of the boys would say something racist like "I hate blacks" :( :( :(. Then if that boy didn't say "safety" fast enough, another boy would say "now you have to touch one". My son's best friend told me that if they couldn't find someone black (there were very very few in the school) they would often touch Sawyer since he has tan skin (he is part Hispanic). He said he thought I would want to know.
Later after his best friend left I asked him about it. Was it true that most of the fifth grade boys were playing a game called "the racist game" and then touching him? "Yes", said Sawyer, "but they only touch me because I'm always wearing a black shirt".
We had had neighbors move to a nearby (far-more-diverse) city, citing racism in the local middle school as the main reason. Their girl was Hispanic, had all black friends, and said that many of the white girls were mean to them and she was sure it was due to racism. At the time I had hoped she was mistaken or her experience was an anomaly, but now I wasn't so sure.
I emailed Sawyer's teacher and principal and told them everything the boys had told me. I never got a response. I can't remember now if I also spoke to the special education lady that worked with Sawyer about it - when we last spoke we were withdrawing Sawyer from public school and there was so much to discuss.
TWO DAYS - TWO THINGS
1/ I overheard a very disturbing phone conversation (my 9yo was eavesdropping in on his big brother's call and brought me the phone) during which a close friend conveyed a wide variety of sexual topics and suggestions peppered with many swear words to our shocked son in under a minute. We communicated this to the child's mom and the school, even though it didn't happen on school property, and asked him to please not speak with Sawyer again. It broke my heart. Sawyer's friend left apologetic sniffly messages for a couple of weeks afterwards on our answering machine and Sawyer cried each time.
2/ Let me preface this by saying that aside from an occasional note passing incident, Sawyer had never been in trouble at school (not that you get in trouble for note passing, really). One fateful day Sawyer and his best friend used a class paper clip to make a pretend lock pick. Sawyer had been heard joking about breaking into the school with a paperclip some weeks before so it was of course taken very seriously when it was discovered on his desk. Another transgression that happened the same day involved his best friend's watch which had a video recording function. The teacher caught them recording their classmates during class, which was a huge no no because of privacy laws (??). The teacher put it on her desk with plans of taking it to the principal to have the video footage erased. When it came time for recess, Sawyer's best friend put his watch back on and went merrily on his way, having no idea this would be seen as an act of terrible rebellion. I received a call from the school and I gave permission for Sawyer to be spoken to sternly by the principal (they asked for my thoughts given his severe anxiety). Even so, I had no idea he would be suspended (a one day in-school suspension - in the principal's office) and was beyond shocked when a paper came home listing as a reason for suspension in big bold letters: THEFT .
LOSING HIS BEST FRIEND
Sawyer's best friend was switched to a different classroom by the school. His parents grounded him for two weeks and as a result he wasn't allowed to come to Sawyer's birthday party. They both cried for days. One day they sneaked a phone call and Sawyer came crying to tell us that his best friend's parents had said he was never to speak to him again because they considered Sawyer a bad influence. This really gave us pause. We had always considered his best friend the bad influence - a latchkey child, he often spent time at our home after school so I had gotten to know him quite well - but we had convinced ourselves that because we were being a good influence on him and he was at heart a very sweet boy, it would all cancel itself out.
EVACUATING SAWYER
We gave notice that we were pulling Sawyer to homeschool him using a form letter I found online. I notified his teacher and thanked her for her hard work and kindness but didn't hear much from her beyond the practicalities of getting his supplies. The registrar was somewhat passive aggressive, asking us what curriculum we would be using (I told her a mix of things, we aren't required to provide any information in Texas and homeschools are considered private schools). She warned me to keep good records because one day Texas might require homeschoolers to use a set curriculum and report in regularly like some other states (extremely unlikely and records wouldn't be expected retroactively anyway). She asked if there was anything they could do to make his school experience better. I couldn't think of anything. I went back a few days later to bring back our library books and she had a very kind, sympathetic expression on her face. What had she heard?
POSITIVE CHANGE
I will go into more detail about our early days of homeschooling in another post but did want to briefly touch on changes we saw in Sawyer in the first two weeks. He did not want to leave school and cried the first two days. The third day he started asking about homeschooling and looked excited by what he heard. By the end of the first two weeks:
He was walking with confidence (as upright as an 11 year old tween can get)
He stopped ignoring his little brothers
His eyes were sparkly and alive again
He was back to making witty dry commentary
He was smiling his sweet almost-a-laugh smile
He started calling me mommy again AND ASKING ME TO HUG HIM GOODNIGHT
MORE STUFF
Read about why we decided to put our children in public school despite originally wanting to homeschool here - Before We Homeschooled
Coming next (Jack's Homeschool Preschool Coop, Teddy's story, Everett's story, Early Days of Homeschooling, What is Everschooling?)
COMMENT BELOW
Has your child or a child you know had similar experiences?
Saturday, July 14, 2012
Before We Homeschooled
PREQUEL
The hubby and I had always planned to homeschool. We worried about the negative effects peers might have on our children, and I had tutored and taught children's classes over the years and LOVED LOVED LOVED it. I couldn't wait to have two attentive (ha ha) little students of my very own one day, far far far in the future, after finishing my doctoral program in child clinical psychology.
We got married towards the end of my first year and promptly got honeymoon pregnant. Uh oh.
I had an amazing fellowship (full tuition plus an annual stipend), but we had always wanted our children to have a stay at home mom. We both had a deep appreciation for our own mothers staying home with us, and I had read so much regarding the benefits from a child development perspective. I left my program and made a dramatic career change to mom.
After two I talked my hubby into three and then four. He talked me into five - how can you say no to "I want one for every finger on my hand"?
SPEECH THERAPY
Our boys all needed speech therapy (for a mysterious articulation delay that runs in my family) and the public school system provides speech therapy for free so in they went. The three older boys eventually graduated from speech therapy, but it was so easy to keep sending them to school.
READING
Each time we sent a boy to Kindergartener the requirements were more stringent. Our first learned his letters one at a time throughout his Kindergarten year. Our second was expected to be able to read by the end of Kindergarten. Our third was given a reading test six weeks after starting Kindergarten and I was told he was one of only two children in the class who didn't already know how to read. All of our children were reading delayed, with the older two starting to read smoothly at the end of 2nd grade. I tried to help them at home and convinced myself I was terrible at teaching children how to read. I would eventually realize that it had nothing to do with me - my boys were just not ready.
HOMEWORK
I was STAGGERED by the vast amounts of homework and paperwork the kids brought home. How could I hope to teach my children if I could barely get them to finish their homework by dinner???
I had lost my confidence that I could teach them myself, but hoarded educational supplies nevertheless, telling my hubby that if any of the kids ever needed it I would homeschool them - as long as it was one at a time.
STATUS QUO
It wasn't all smooth sailing, but right up until we decided to pull our three older boys out to homeschool, we felt public school was the best place for them. In the weeks leading up to my decision we were relatively pleased with the education they were getting. They were at an exemplary school. The boys were all doing well academically and had teachers and friends they loved. Getting up at 6:45 every morning was grueling for my husband (I was banned from the job by a unanimous family vote due to my cruel and unusual not-a-morning-person attitude) but we had no other choice, right?
COMMENT BELOW
If you don't homeschool, have you ever considered it? What holds you back?
What do you see as the pros and cons of public schooling or homeschooling?
The hubby and I had always planned to homeschool. We worried about the negative effects peers might have on our children, and I had tutored and taught children's classes over the years and LOVED LOVED LOVED it. I couldn't wait to have two attentive (ha ha) little students of my very own one day, far far far in the future, after finishing my doctoral program in child clinical psychology.
We got married towards the end of my first year and promptly got honeymoon pregnant. Uh oh.
I had an amazing fellowship (full tuition plus an annual stipend), but we had always wanted our children to have a stay at home mom. We both had a deep appreciation for our own mothers staying home with us, and I had read so much regarding the benefits from a child development perspective. I left my program and made a dramatic career change to mom.
After two I talked my hubby into three and then four. He talked me into five - how can you say no to "I want one for every finger on my hand"?
SPEECH THERAPY
Our boys all needed speech therapy (for a mysterious articulation delay that runs in my family) and the public school system provides speech therapy for free so in they went. The three older boys eventually graduated from speech therapy, but it was so easy to keep sending them to school.
READING
Each time we sent a boy to Kindergartener the requirements were more stringent. Our first learned his letters one at a time throughout his Kindergarten year. Our second was expected to be able to read by the end of Kindergarten. Our third was given a reading test six weeks after starting Kindergarten and I was told he was one of only two children in the class who didn't already know how to read. All of our children were reading delayed, with the older two starting to read smoothly at the end of 2nd grade. I tried to help them at home and convinced myself I was terrible at teaching children how to read. I would eventually realize that it had nothing to do with me - my boys were just not ready.
HOMEWORK
I was STAGGERED by the vast amounts of homework and paperwork the kids brought home. How could I hope to teach my children if I could barely get them to finish their homework by dinner???
I had lost my confidence that I could teach them myself, but hoarded educational supplies nevertheless, telling my hubby that if any of the kids ever needed it I would homeschool them - as long as it was one at a time.
STATUS QUO
It wasn't all smooth sailing, but right up until we decided to pull our three older boys out to homeschool, we felt public school was the best place for them. In the weeks leading up to my decision we were relatively pleased with the education they were getting. They were at an exemplary school. The boys were all doing well academically and had teachers and friends they loved. Getting up at 6:45 every morning was grueling for my husband (I was banned from the job by a unanimous family vote due to my cruel and unusual not-a-morning-person attitude) but we had no other choice, right?
COMMENT BELOW
If you don't homeschool, have you ever considered it? What holds you back?
What do you see as the pros and cons of public schooling or homeschooling?
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