PREQUEL
The hubby and I had always planned to homeschool. We worried about the negative effects peers might have on our children, and I had tutored and taught children's classes over the years and LOVED LOVED LOVED it. I couldn't wait to have two attentive (ha ha) little students of my very own one day, far far far in the future, after finishing my doctoral program in child clinical psychology.
We got married towards the end of my first year and promptly got honeymoon pregnant. Uh oh.
I had an amazing fellowship (full tuition plus an annual stipend), but we had always wanted our children to have a stay at home mom. We both had a deep appreciation for our own mothers staying home with us, and I had read so much regarding the benefits from a child development perspective. I left my program and made a dramatic career change to mom.
After two I talked my hubby into three and then four. He talked me into five - how can you say no to "I want one for every finger on my hand"?
SPEECH THERAPY
Our boys all needed speech therapy (for a mysterious articulation delay that runs in my family) and the public school system provides speech therapy for free so in they went. The three older boys eventually graduated from speech therapy, but it was so easy to keep sending them to school.
READING
Each time we sent a boy to Kindergartener the requirements were more stringent. Our first learned his letters one at a time throughout his Kindergarten year. Our second was expected to be able to read by the end of Kindergarten. Our third was given a reading test six weeks after starting Kindergarten and I was told he was one of only two children in the class who didn't already know how to read. All of our children were reading delayed, with the older two starting to read smoothly at the end of 2nd grade. I tried to help them at home and convinced myself I was terrible at teaching children how to read. I would eventually realize that it had nothing to do with me - my boys were just not ready.
HOMEWORK
I was STAGGERED by the vast amounts of homework and paperwork the kids brought home. How could I hope to teach my children if I could barely get them to finish their homework by dinner???
I had lost my confidence that I could teach them myself, but hoarded educational supplies nevertheless, telling my hubby that if any of the kids ever needed it I would homeschool them - as long as it was one at a time.
STATUS QUO
It wasn't all smooth sailing, but right up until we decided to pull our three older boys out to homeschool, we felt public school was the best place for them. In the weeks leading up to my decision we were relatively pleased with the education they were getting. They were at an exemplary school. The boys were all doing well academically and had teachers and friends they loved. Getting up at 6:45 every morning was grueling for my husband (I was banned from the job by a unanimous family vote due to my cruel and unusual not-a-morning-person attitude) but we had no other choice, right?
COMMENT BELOW
If you don't homeschool, have you ever considered it? What holds you back?
What do you see as the pros and cons of public schooling or homeschooling?
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ReplyDeleteI love the way you tell your family's stories. It's very interesting, captivating, and it made my heart melt when you saw those changes in your son at 5th grade. I too, experienced my daughter withdrawing. Something was taking her from us. She didn't feel she had any gifts, talents, specialness at this point. All was taken from her. Everything she was born with was transferred in a way that we can not explain. Reading your blog made the feelings come out about our experience. You do really well explaining/telling the story. I'm taking charge now. Thank goodness I woke. I knew I didn't want my daughter in the school she was in for the past 3 years. All the signs were there, but I too didn't have the confidence in myself to do anything about it. When my middle daughter was set to start at that very school, that's when we/I (really only me) said that is enough torture for my family. We are now Home Schoolers. What joy it has been to watch them gain their gifts back, be confident once again in an area they are good at, to get up and try...and keep trying... if it's what they want to do.. It's been an amazing journey in one short year. I'm so very glad to people that blog about this, and others that have written books. Thank you to you for blogging this, and to Charlotte Thomas Iserbyt, John Taylor Gatto and the memories of my own torture through school that brought me to awaken (I know, it took a lot to get past the brain washing of I'm not good enough). Thank you so much for this piece. You're very good at what you're doing... You touched my heart...
ReplyDeleteAnd you touched mine B+M+Z. Thank you so much for your kind words. I was having a very difficult homeschooling day when you posted this (so hard to transition the kids back to school after taking a 3 week break) and had been entertaining ideas of shipping them all off to public school. I texted my hubby at work and said, "I don't care about their social needs anymore!" all dramatically (not really meaning it, but you know...). Your post was so perfectly timed. And it was good for me to reread my post about the changes in Sawyer. It was so dramatic and he is so wonderful. Our next school day was great btw :) Our homeschool coops are starting up again soon, and I'm feeling the support of my fellow homeschool mamas, even if they don't realize they're providing it :) Best of luck to you in your journey.
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